I am having a quarter-life crisis. I’ve come to the realization that I have absolutely no idea (not even the slightest) what I want to do with my life and it’s a bit scary.
I graduated high school 9 years ago and while I have accomplished quite a bit over the years, I still am not where I thought I’d be at this point in my life. Turning 29 in about 5 months is really making me overthink and stressing myself out. I am almost 30 and my life is a mess.
I’ve went to college twice, the first time I did graduate with my certificate in Office Administration. The second, I didn’t finish and that totally screwed up any chance for me to even go back to college if I wanted to. At this point, I honestly have no idea what I want to do as a career choice and even now if I figured out something that I wanted to do, how would I even pursue it? I can’t get funding to go back to school!
I am stuck. I don’t know what to do moving forward. I’ve worked so many jobs in my life that have never made me truly happy as I didn’t enjoy them. Things I do enjoy doing, I can’t make money from… I mean I could but it would take a long time and honestly I would need money to invest in them if I really wanted to make a career from it.
What can I do to figure stuff out? How can I be truly happy with my life?
Everything is a mess. My life is a mess.
I understand that there is no set timeline of when you are suppose to have your life and shit together, but society plays a major part in that and makes you think that you need to have your life and shit together by 30 and I believe that is why so many people in there 20s are going through quarter life crisis. Many people, sadly, don’t know what they want and that fact that there is so much pressure put on you to have a career, get married, buy a house, and have children all by 30-35 is making everyone enter into a depression.
For someone who already struggles with anxiety and depression, this just takes the cake. How many more things can I add to my never ending thought process before I have a breakdown? I am strong and have weaved my way through many moments in my life where I thought for sure I was gonna have a breakdown but I fought it and came through. But at the same time, you can only fight for so long before it takes a huge toll on you.
I have so many questions that my mind races through everyday.
Like: How do you push through societies rules about life or whatever you want to call it? How do you break away from the mold that society wants you to become? How do you stop living a life to please others and start doing it for yourself? Why do I care so much about what others think of me? How can I make money? What kind of career do I want? What will make me happy? And so on and so on.
It’s tough. And honestly I’m just taking life one day at time and hopefully one day I’ll stumble upon something that will make me happy and I’ll know what I want. That’s all any of us can do at this point.
I’ll write soon!